7 Things to Tell Yourself Every Night for More Happiness and Positivity

Mel Robbins introduces the common problem many face at bedtime: racing thoughts, worries, and negative self-talk that prevent restful sleep. She emphasizes the importance of changing the brain's settings before sleep to wake up happier and more positive. The episode's purpose is to provide a practical, science-backed routine of seven affirmations or phrases to help quiet the mind and promote better sleep and outlook.

Mel shares insights from top researchers including Stanford neuroscientist Dr. Aliyah Krum, who discusses how you can change mental settings through simple affirmation steps. Dr. Krum emphasizes starting where you are emotionally and asking yourself what mindset could help you handle your current challenges—be it illness, stress, or overwhelm. Mel also incorporates perspectives from Dr. Lisa DeMore, a clinical psychologist, who states that experiencing distress, such as grief or anxiety, is part of being mentally well, especially when it’s aligned with reality. The idea that acceptance of feelings is healthy is a recurring theme.

Mel guides listeners through specific phrases to use with oneself each night: acknowledging feelings ('It’s okay to feel overwhelmed'), reminding oneself of management ('I can manage this'), and affirming the priority of rest ('Now is my time to restore and relax'). She highlights the importance of not treating every thought as an emergency ('I don’t need to solve this right now') and the power of giving oneself permission to drift off ('I give myself permission to sleep'). Additional techniques include writing down unresolved thoughts to clear the mind and setting up for the next day to reduce morning stress.

Mel references scientific studies, such as Baylor University research showing that making to-do lists of unfinished tasks helps people fall asleep faster. She discusses how changing sleep routines, managing thoughts, and using affirmations are backed by multiple studies to improve sleep quality, emotional health, and manage stress.

Mel shares personal anecdotes about her own experiences with nighttime worries, including her mammogram scare and family logistics. She emphasizes that feelings of overwhelm are normal and that practicing these affirmations helps shift perception from catastrophe to manageability. Mel also discusses how prominent figures like Dr. Daniel Aiman recommend starting each day with a positive affirmation ('Today is going to be a good day') to set a constructive tone and improve outcomes.

Listeners are encouraged to adopt these phrases into their bedtime routines, share the episode with loved ones, and access resources such as a free downloadable list of the seven affirmations on Mel’s website. She also promotes signing up for her newsletter and other ways to stay connected for ongoing support.